To my husband,
I just want to say thank you.
Two small words. But I don’t say them enough.
I don’t tell you enough how much I love you and appreciate all you do. You’re always there by my side when I need you most.
So many times I have been too knackered or too sad or too lost to let you know how much that means. That you are there. No matter what. Because we’re a team of two. An AMAZING team of two.
And so I want to say thank you.
Thank you for being by my side when I was in labour.
Thank you for letting me squeeze your hand too tight and for letting me swear at you for getting me into this situation in the first place.
Thank you for knowing what I wanted and being my voice when I was too tired, during labour, to say so. For asking questions to make sure it was what we needed when I was too scared and too exhausted to speak. And for staying calm when I got hysterical and soothing me back to reality.
Thank you for playing bouncer and limiting visitors when I had tears and snot dripping down my face because I was in a giant nappy and couldn’t face the world yet.
Thank you for being on my side and by my side when I tried to breastfeed. Thank you for not letting me feel any more guilt and shame than I already did when it didn’t work.
Thank you for waking up early and taking the baby in the early morning when I had been up feeding in the night and letting me sleep.
Thank you for always making me a cup of tea and bringing it to me in bed before you leave for work.
Thank you for all those times when you knew I was at my wit’s end and gave me a hug and then took the baby out for a walk so I could have some time.
Thank you for never complaining when you came home after a long day at work to find us all crying. And for scooping us all up and making it all better. Even though you were tired too.
Thank you for making me feel beautiful when I felt fat and rubbish. Thank you for showing me how beautiful I still am to you. Thank you for making me feel it. And believe it.
Thank you for making me stronger. By making me feel like I was a good mum. By always being my biggest cheerleader and telling me that I was doing an amazing job, even when I doubted it.
Thank you for all the hours you put in playing with our children. Thank you for drinking all the pretendy cups of tea and building forts in the lounge and for letting them take risks by climbing trees when I was always a little scared.
Thank you for always being there at parties and throwing yourself into whatever we’ve planned. Thank you for dressing up as a pirate and leading all the guests on a treasure hunt.
Thank you for knowing when I need a break and making sure I have one.
Thank you for letting me know that it’s OK to not be OK and not asking why and just hugging me and loving me more until I feel better again.
Thank you for making me feel that being a mum is a real job and that it doesn’t matter if I’m not being paid. And for making sure the bills are paid and we’re all OK.
Thank you for making me feel safe and secure and loved. No matter what.
Thank you for being you. For never changing. For loving me. And our babies.